Fat Betty Draper

I think it's awesome that Betty Draper is fat. Never before has anyone deserved to become fat as much as she did. Betty was the vainest, most superficial character in the history of television (as always, all facts are unofficial) and deserved to pack on the post-beauty queen pounds more than anyone.

Draper was probably the first character to react with disappointment to the news that she didn't have cancer. "Oh, so I'm just fat!?" she said, dejectedly. I was shocked but not surprised, if that's possible.

At some point, January Jones will shed the fat suit, and all will well in her miserable world, once again. But, until then, I'm going to enjoy seeing Betty get her comeuppance. (Because that's what I'm all about!) Nobody has ever disdained ugliness more than her, and now, in her own eyes, Betty is pure fugs.

Will the character learn from this experience? I guarantee the answer is no. Betty Draper is the worst person on TV. The worst. She's awful. A bad person, if there is such a thing (there is). Nothing will prevent her from achieving her life's purpose of turning demented little Sally into a serial killer.

And if it makes me a bad person to enjoy watching a bad person suffer (in fiction), then so be it. This storyline is juicy and I love it. Plus, watching Betty get sick with cancer before she withers and dies would have depressing television.

I'd rather watch 'Bets' pound the Bugles.